


Now I Know

by timaeusTestified



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Established Relationship, Feels, Implied/Referenced Cheating, Loki Has Issues, M/M, What Have I Done
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-04-15
Updated: 2016-09-07
Packaged: 2018-06-02 09:06:02
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 2,088
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6560368
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/timaeusTestified/pseuds/timaeusTestified
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There's a S.H.E.I.L.D meeting discussing Loki and if its safe to have him on Midgard</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter One

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (The story on Wattpad that has the same title and content written by lokithegodofchaos is not someone else having copied my work it is me as well)

   

Loki and Tony ride up the elevator to their shared floor in the Avengers tower, both of them silent and tense after the meeting. The elevator opens up on their floor shortly and Tony laughs light, walking over to his bar and pouring himself a drink. Loki follows him and stands opposite of him, with a grim expression. ¨I have been living here for months and they still insist that I am a threat? I have sparred and trained and even fought along their sides and still they believe I need to go through this ´evaluation´?¨ Loki says, crossing his arms defensively.

Tony sips his drink before nodding. ¨I´m afraid so, babe. It'll be over soon, though. Just a couple of weeks of checking in with Fury and you'll be golden!¨ 

Loki huffs and turns away from him to look out the window at the city. ¨I should not have to ´check in´ the first place! He put a tracker in my neck, Anthony. I have done  _ nothing _ upon my returning to Midgard to warrant this!¨ 

Tony sighs and sets his drink down. ¨I'm not saying they should, but, you did destroy most of the city and try to kill us all, not to mention the whole ´God of chaos and a frost giant with magic' thing. It can be kind of scary, especially to people who don't get it.¨ he says, trying to get him to understand why S.H.E.I.L.D had decided to do this. 

Loki lets out a wry laugh as he slowly turns around, a look of shock and betrayal etched into his features.

¨Now I know the truth, then.¨ He shakes his head and takes a step towards the engineer. ¨You're really still see me as they do? As a monster of destruction! After everything, I trusted you, I-" 

Loki's look of betrayal had been replaced with rage, a green light emitting from his palms. 

¨Fine. I´ll have to prove you right, then.¨ He says flatly, firing energy towards Tony before retreating to the other side of the room, mumbling spells under his breath in a harsh tone, light starting to fill the room. Tony had ducked behind the bar and only had a few cuts from the broken glass, he grabs the remote control Fury had given him and he had hoped he could´ve just thrown away. He quickly presses the large red button and an electrical buzzing and a choked scream can be heard as the tracker implanted in Loki's neck sends an electrical wave through his body, effectively paralyzing him for the time being and leaving him a heap on the floor. Jarvis had called the other Avengers and S.H.E.I.L.D as soon as Loki had began his short lived attack and they arrive, gathering the god and detaining him. 

    Less than an hour later Loki is put into a holding cell, hardly comprehending what was going on around him. He lays on the cot, staring blankly out at Tony who was standing on the other side of the glass cell, trying not to glare at Loki as he shakes his head and walks away. ¨I had loved you..¨ Loki whispers to the empty room, a soft whimper followed by silent sobbing that wrack his body ensue until more S.H.E.I.L.D agents come in to sedate him. 


	2. I Came to Save You

     Loki had been difficult to say the least. After being taken into custody he had refused to give any information and acted out in every way he could. He was a mess. They'd try to ask him questions he would headbutt them or kick or punch until they ended up having to restrain him completely. He had been poked and prodded and electrocuted until he was nearly delusional then put back in his cell when he still wouldn't talk. It´d been nearly two weeks of the same thing everyday, no visitors except for Thor who was appalled at the way his brother was being treated but refused to stand against Fury´s orders. 

     Loki had just finished his usual routine of being nearly drowned and biting his tongue only to be strapped down to his cot to await the same thing tomorrow. He sucks in air and tries to steady his breathing, eventually falling asleep. He is woken by a familiar voice calling his name quietly and someone shaking his shoulders. He blinks away sleep and looks up at the figure of Tony, who had appeared to be upset.

     ¨Lo..Hey, you gotta be quiet, okay..?" Tony whispers. Loki nods and looks up at him, feeling a guilty pain in his chest. 

¨I came to save you. I talked to Fury, and you're not supposed to know this but if you cooperate, then he will let you go.. So please tell them what they need to know or... Something bad might happen, Lo. Just tell them what they want to know.¨ 

     Loki looks up at him and shakes his head. ¨Anthony, I do not know the answers to their questions! I know nothing more about Thanos than what he told me and I have already told them that! I have no more answers..¨ He rasps out, voice hoarse from lack of use. Tony sighs and nods a little.

     ¨I really didn't want it to come to this.¨ Tony says, quickly plunging a syringe into Loki's neck, the heavy sedatives effectively knocking him out. 

     ¨Start it up.¨ Fury says, a whirling noise filling the room and the smell of burning and electricity fill the air. Loki was strapped to a chair with electrodes stuck to his temples, the leads going beyond his vision. He was getting quite tired of being strapped down to things. He felt himself becoming numb, starting at his hands and feet and working its way up. 

     Tony had started the machine upon Fury's order. ¨What´s this doing to him, again?¨ He asks, slightly concerned. 

     ¨Its extracting information and displaying it on the screen. Everything he knows, the truth.¨ Fury says, proud of himself. He points to the monitor showing line after line of script. An agent comes up to them about an hour later. ¨Sir, there's nothing else about Thanos." He says quickly before leaving, having seen the look of turmoil on Tony's face. 


	3. Home Sweet Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Im just really sorry.

It would take a long time to regain the same level of trust Loki had built with Tony, but he was finally being allowed to go back to the tower and hopefully everything would return to normal soon. All he wanted was to lay in bed with his boyfriend and talk an out stupid things like the weather and how nice relaxing is and how they should definitely take a long bubble bath together. That's not too much to ask for, or that's what he thought at least.   
He got back to the tower with Tony as his escort. They ride up the elevator in silence and Loki can tell Tony wants to say something, but instead the engineer simply reaches out and gently takes the gods hand in his own. The elevator doors slide open to reveal the penthouse they had been sharing before the incident. He steps out of the elevator with Tony close behind.   
¨Look, Lo, I have to-" The inventor starts, being cut off by the god quickly.   
¨Tony, I just want things to go back to how they were, okay? I just want to lay down with you on our bed and relax for a little while.." He says softly, managing a small smile in his loves direction.   
Loki lets go of Tony's hand and walks down the hallway to their once shared room before Tony could stop him. Loki opens the door to find a very confused Pepper Potts standing in the room and putting women's clothing into a drawer. Loki freezes and takes in the sight, understanding what it meant as Tony's belongings where still in the room and the bed had clearly been more than slept in by two people. He slowly backs away from the door and turning to hurry back down the hallway, being stopped by Tony stepping in his path.   
¨Loki, I tried to tell you. Its been a while since you.. Went away, and Pepper and I worked out some of our issues and she- She helped me, okay? And you're still welcome to live here with us, all of us, there is plenty of space and Nat has really missed your gossip nights, so just- just don´t be irrational about this, okay?" He gets out in one hurried breath, trying to explain as quickly as he could. Loki just stares at the man in front of him, his emotions seamlessly masked and his eyes still and cold. After a moment he nods and steps around the shorter man to walk past him and into the living area of the penthouse. He looks around at all of the shelves where pictures of him and Tony once resided, most of them having been replaced already with almost the same memories except it was no longer him on Tony´s arm at a charity ball or holding the stuffed bear the engineer had won for him at the fair. Loki turns back to face the dumbfounded inventor who had been expecting an outburst or tears or something other than the silence he had received when Loki simply sits on the couch, still facing Tony and fixing him with the cold stare.   
¨Pepper seems like a nice girl.¨ He says, voice void of any emotion at all as he continues to look around the room, seemingly indifferent. Tony shifts uncomfortably, becoming more and more unsettled.   
¨Well, Welcome home.¨ Tony eventually says, unsure of what else to say. Loki nods and smiles coldly at him.   
¨Home sweet home.¨


	4. Nightmare Dressed Like A Daydream

Tony is whistling in the kitchen and making pancakes for himself and Loki. The god in question is watching him and sitting on the counter, absentmindedly playing with the hem of his shirt.  
¨Tony, do we really have to go to that meeting later?¨ He asks, not wanting to go at all. He would much rather stay home with Tony and watch movies all day while cuddling one the couch. Tony sighs and puts the pancakes on two plates, handing one of them to Loki.  
¨Lokes, you know how much I love breaking the rules, but.." He pauses, taking a bite of his pancakes.  
¨screw it, you know what? let´s stay home today. ¨ He smiles and kisses Loki´s cheek lightly. Loki grins and eats his pancakes happily before getting off the counter and setting his plate in the sink. He walks up behind Tony and wraps his arms around his waist. "I love you, so much.¨ He says softly. Tony turns towards him, his face morphing into an expression of anger and disgust. "How could you even say something so ridiculous? As if I could ever care about you.¨ He turns and shoves Loki back with great force. Loki´s back hits the fridge as he hadn't been expecting the shove. Tony begins to stalk towards him with a malicious grins on his face and a large knife in his hand. Loki screams and wakes up in a cold sweat, he looks around and slowly realizes he had been asleep beside Tony in there bed and not beneath him in their kitchen. He calms himself after a moment and lays back down. He feels Tony's arm circle his waist and he leans into the touch happily.  
¨Lo, did you have a nightmare?¨ The engineers groggy voice asks.  
¨Yeah, it was nothing, I´m fine.¨ He says softly, already feeling better. He turns around to face Tony, smiling a little as he does. He opens his eyes and jumps awake, realizing he had been dreaming and was alone in Tony´s guest room. He wasn't in his cell, he wasn't in their kitchen watching Tony make pancakes like they did every Saturday, He wasn't curled up in Tony´s arms, sleeping happily. He was alone, with the love of his life across the hall having very loud sex with with some women who he had once called friend. He pulls his pillow over his head and sobs, allowing the loud cries wrack his body. He stays that way, curling into a tight ball with his knees in his chest and sobbing into them until he eventually falls into a thankfully dreamless sleep.

**Author's Note:**

> I drew pictures to go with this, its just Loki for right now because I am bad at drawing Tony's hair but i tried they´re on my Instagram @lyriumengravedheart feel free to check that out.


End file.
